Alt Guy Rolling on Ecstasy strips naked with glow sticks, raves around room dancing to Crystal Castles
Published on Wednesday 5/19/2010 @ 8:34 AM by the ALT REPORT Robot
Does n e 1 know what happened to Crystal Castles? It seems like just yesterday their album leaked, they got a ‘decent’ Pitchfork score, but they haven’t really produced a stream of memes that kept their fans engaged. I could honestly go for a few Alice Glass memes, maybe some dark music videos that leave me conceptually dissatisfied, and maybe even some ‘controversial quotes’ / stories about how CC were ‘complete dicks’ to a few bands on the road. Just expect a lil more buzz from buzzbands, even if the buzz is kinda forced.
Just glad this bro raved around his room to Crystal Castles’ “Vietnam.” I gave the album a ‘power skim’ but I only really listened to their song when this bro created engaging content. His dance seems to be commentary on the Crystal Castles fan base–sorta like those weirdo California ravers who go to Hardfest. I guess it is good that their brand is strong so they get critical acclaim, but still get this weird feeling that the band’s core fan base is really dark/tweeny/shops at Hot Topic.
Do u want more Crystal Castles content?
Is their album cycle over?
Have yall ever sucked on a pacifier and listened to CC with a few lil glowsticks?
Have yall ever ‘rolled’ [via ecstasy] and danced around to buzzworthy music/vlogged?
What is the long term outlook for Crystal Castles’ brand: the next AnCo or are they just part of the L.A. electro scene [via mexi alts]?
Does this bro have the perfect male alt body?
99 comments to “Alt Guy Rolling on Ecstasy strips naked with glow sticks, raves around room dancing to Crystal Castles”
May 19th, 2010 at 8:37 am
guuucci!!
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//////////Reply by gucci meme
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 9:40 am
@hjznbluntz, burr
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//////////Reply by justw2brelv
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 11:54 am
@gucci meme, skert!
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//////////Reply by WhiteBlipster
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 9:22 pm
@hjznbluntz, FLOCKA! [brick and the squads]
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May 19th, 2010 at 8:39 am
rah rah rah ryyyan dicks bro
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May 19th, 2010 at 8:40 am
fursty!
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//////////Reply by THAT BRO
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 10:09 am
@PeePanter,
THAT BRO IS ME
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May 19th, 2010 at 8:44 am
prob 12bs too heavy, but hot newayz… wuz geettin hard for the potential peen-slip, nohomo
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//////////Reply by Tuscaloosa Carnivore
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 7:10 pm
@PeePanter, ‘id hit it’[via brooklyn vegan][via dickhead in cubicle]
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May 19th, 2010 at 8:54 am
better than Crystal Castles: http://bebopkids.blogspot.com/2010/05/white-ring.html
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//////////Reply by chill paxton
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 12:31 pm
@F, stop trying 2 make ‘witch house’ happen gretchen
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//////////Reply by F
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 1:09 pm
@chill paxton, Alice Glass or M.I.A?
Carles: Damn. I think M.I.A. is more of an ‘artist’, and Alice Glass is sort of just ‘reluctantly pretending’ to be a musician. Not sure. M.I.A. might be a ‘sell out.’ Not sure if I even like ‘women in music.’ Think that I will answer this question with the response: ‘Feist.’
asked by The Teenagers bro: http://www.dazeddigital.com/ArtsAndCulture/article/4364/1/I_am_Carles_Are_you_Carles
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May 19th, 2010 at 9:11 am
R. M. Dicks > Bebe Zeva
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May 19th, 2010 at 9:19 am
this bro wants 2 be as skinny as me
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//////////Reply by gingerbeard alt
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 2:34 pm
@ya, yeah, likes the bro’s beard and squarish alt face. thats all. can’t hear the song too well.
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May 19th, 2010 at 9:26 am
this is performance art, <3 u jerk store
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May 19th, 2010 at 9:28 am
Ryan Dicks. I was really distracted, bro. We both know why.
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May 19th, 2010 at 9:28 am
i was all ready to ridicule this bro, but he does have a wicked nice body…
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May 19th, 2010 at 9:29 am
‘mad baller yuppies in the house’
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May 19th, 2010 at 9:38 am
gay
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//////////Reply by PeePanter
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 10:15 am
@authentic gucci,
nohomo
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May 19th, 2010 at 9:43 am
CC aren’t apart of the LA electro-scene. Whoops, Carles :(
CC are completely different, they don’t wanna be percieved as an ‘alt’ group. they just want terrorize the masses with their blipcore thrash dance…and leave ‘em alone they’re doing a good job.
Damn, Carles got it so wrong :(
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//////////Reply by Satanz Gr8
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 1:06 pm
@NancyHill, Canadian
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//////////Reply by NancyHill
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 1:31 pm
@Satanz Gr8, I know
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May 19th, 2010 at 9:51 am
Bet Carles faps to this…
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May 19th, 2010 at 9:54 am
hes alright but he aint got shit on drugged up washed out bro
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May 19th, 2010 at 9:55 am
THIS GUY.
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//////////Reply by brobro
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 9:57 am
@brobro,
poser
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//////////Reply by accidental poser
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 10:06 am
@brobro, apologies <3
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//////////Reply by brobro
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 10:10 am
@accidental poser,
its chill
at least u got an authentic name for hro
May 19th, 2010 at 10:10 am
missed u, jerkstore. lawlz irl when u dropped that glowstick. <3
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May 19th, 2010 at 10:15 am
looks more like adderall, bro
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May 19th, 2010 at 10:17 am
i need help bros and chickbros
how should i think/feel/react/go on living due to this? \/
http://pitchfork.com/news/38852-new-toro-y-moi-leave-everywhere/
download here \/
http://downloads.pitchforkmedia.com/Toro%20Y%20Moi%20-%20Leave%20Everywhere.mp3
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May 19th, 2010 at 10:19 am
his threads do iron man numbers. learn your meme carles.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hMeedom2WPM&feature=player_embedded#!
same fella.
also, why do you fools feel the need to write like carles?
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//////////Reply by brobro
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 10:22 am
@ina,
i no i try [via havin no real / 'authentic identity']
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//////////Reply by altigator
//////////Posted May 20th, 2010 at 12:28 pm
@brobro, OP is a douche and has proven so in his extensive argument. Must have thought this was hipsterchan.org
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//////////Reply by awk
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 10:32 am
@ina, carles has reported on ryan dicks multiple times “dude”
HRO ENTRY LEVELER
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//////////Reply by ina
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 10:41 am
@awk, sorry, guess i don’t catch every post like you. let me try…. [via real life]
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//////////Reply by awkz
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 10:42 am
@ina, typical newbie argument
//////////Reply by ZUCCURES
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 11:23 am
@ina, n00b
//////////Reply by a lolin bro
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 7:58 pm
@ina, gotta 2nd this [via soz ina, miss u irl, <3 u, miss u, soz]
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//////////Reply by 555
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 12:45 pm
@ina,
pretty fucking gay and entry level if you only know ryan dicks as the ‘iron man numbers guy’… just sayin bitch
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May 19th, 2010 at 10:24 am
wuz waiting for his mom to come home, catch him dancing in her living room, with a st. vincie visage face looming as a credibility prop. nice dance moves, though.
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//////////Reply by awkz
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 10:33 am
@bear grylls, he actually lives with his grandma
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//////////Reply by Brooey Deschanel
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 12:28 pm
@bear grylls, <3 your name
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//////////Reply by gottabeanony
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 2:46 pm
@Brooey Deschanel, ughzz i thought i invented “awkz” :(
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//////////Reply by Brooey Deschanel
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 8:41 pm
@gottabeanony, no, i like ‘Bear Grylls’, not that ‘awks’ isn’t still chill [via respect]. Man vs Wild is the best show on Cable.
//////////Reply by gingerbeard alt
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 3:09 pm
@bear grylls, thanks 4 pointing out san vincent, didn’t watch enough 2 notice at first. i think this bro could get play at a san vincent concert if he loses the glow sticks.
does any1 know where i can buy 1 of those tee shirts at the beginning?
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May 19th, 2010 at 10:47 am
don’t know how 2 feel abt genre shirt. is this alt an alt like me? thought i was ‘better’ than him, but his shirt puts us on the same page.
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May 19th, 2010 at 10:56 am
does extasy work that fast nowadays?
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//////////Reply by chong
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 11:44 am
@\\\\\, thaught that too
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//////////Reply by frank
//////////Posted May 20th, 2010 at 5:41 pm
@\\\\\, no
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May 19th, 2010 at 11:01 am
I think he just took some fake e and danced in his pants this has never happen to me before
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May 19th, 2010 at 11:20 am
is it bad that i would totally smash?
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May 19th, 2010 at 11:23 am
bro is kewt ;))))
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May 19th, 2010 at 11:49 am
what a total idiot is this guy … I don’t get the Xtc part…. It only starts working after 30+ minutes so he was actually doing this completely sober… kinda sad… but i guess u got ur 5:04 minutes of fame on hro… u happy now ?
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//////////Reply by Gangstarrbro
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 12:48 pm
@MEMEs,
sounds like your fuckin white ass doesnt get jokes… but u do ‘get drugs’, why the fuck don’t you get off this forum and go back to erowid you bitch ass nigga im sick of your shit
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//////////Reply by MEMEs
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 12:53 pm
@Gangstarrbro, sooo you actually find this ‘funny’ niggerbro?
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//////////Reply by Gangstarrbro
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 1:02 pm
@MEMEs,
yo shut your fuckin mouth, I think it’s all fun as shit no matter who a nigga is when he gets stupid and acts an ass… that nigga look fun as shit to hang with. dogg I really laughed at that shit. n fuck you if you can’t appreciate it… you prob some uptight white boy who has to judge other peeps to feel better about his gay ass self. u ever let loose and actually have some fun physically or u gotta stay indoors n read ur fuckin world-aware books n judge other people to feel good about his sad ass boring ass suck ass fuck ass life? n you wonder why u dont get pussy HAHA.
also call me a nigger one more time and I’ll take the r from that word and shove it straight in ur white CEO asshole
//////////Reply by MEMEs
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 1:11 pm
@Gangstarrbro, ur making a fool of urself niggerbro
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//////////Reply by Gangstarrbro
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 1:22 pm
@MEMEs,
HA what a dumb ass pseudo intellectual fake ass threat kinda thing to say. that don’t do shit to me. yo fuck you n I ain’t doin shit but exposin you for the bitch u is. step 1 foot in Queens I dare you, I got a whole infrastructure of niggas ready to straight merk ur ass. u won’t make it one foot off the airtrain, believe it, shit’s mad real white boy.
//////////Reply by MEMEs
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 2:06 pm
@MEMEs, okay i give up, you are making a joke out of this right?
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//////////Reply by Gangstarrbro
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 4:07 pm
@MEMEs,
nope
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//////////Reply by letters2god
//////////Posted May 20th, 2010 at 1:55 am
@Gangstarrbro, hardest mother fucker on the alt report, 4real
//////////Reply by Brover Norquist
//////////Posted May 20th, 2010 at 9:29 am
@Gangstarrbro, plz forward specs on nigga infrastructure to municipal planning division for review
//////////Reply by \\\\\\\\\\
//////////Posted May 20th, 2010 at 10:03 am
@Gangstarrbro, shit just got real up in here yall – white ppl pretending 2 talk ‘jive’ gettn mad n shit then MEMEsbro gettn confused by it
//////////Reply by altbaguette
//////////Posted May 20th, 2010 at 10:53 am
@MEMEs, @Gankstahbro, Bro looks like he is ‘having fun at home’. looks as if he took one roll over a half hour b4 (via panting an molars/tremors.) and now he is taking another one down for his next performance in 1/2 to 5 hrs. think yall need to take the snarky down a level. feel like he is jus’B-in FREE, but not a stellar dancer, no surree. it’s hard 2 b hard on E. it’s hard 2 b relluvent ‘building castles in the sky’ in the afternoon with glo stiks at yer parentshaus. Wondrinn if he died later of dehydration/heat stroke?
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//////////Reply by MEMEs
//////////Posted May 20th, 2010 at 10:56 am
@altbaguette, hey i was just trolling niggerbro, he took the bait gracefully :) and i guess he died yes, otherwise we should have seen a reaction of him :)
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May 19th, 2010 at 11:51 am
Wow did you pay him with that T-Shirt to do that?
Oh, by the way.
Im too fat to be a hipster.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jBDD7Pst7Z8
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May 19th, 2010 at 12:33 pm
This is what I do at Panda Bear concerts
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May 19th, 2010 at 12:57 pm
the heavy breathing is hilarious. while video was playing scrolled down to read comments then scrolled back up and dudes boxer briefs were almost to his ankles. but the best part is the end where he gets all “Loser Landlord from Big Lebowski Performance Art Pose” on you. pretty funny.
join my cult. the kool-aid is AMAZING.
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May 19th, 2010 at 12:58 pm
genre shirt fag
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May 19th, 2010 at 2:57 pm
noo dont give this guy attention
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May 19th, 2010 at 3:04 pm
WHIPS, U KNOW U LOVE THIS SHIT BRO…DONT FRONT
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May 19th, 2010 at 3:19 pm
Hawt!
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May 19th, 2010 at 3:26 pm
carles, i am disappoint
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May 19th, 2010 at 3:51 pm
Starting to wonder if this bro is Carles himself. It’s plausible.
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//////////Reply by Crystal Carles
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 5:45 pm
@HRO Reference Meme, I know him, it is Carles. Lives next door here in Copenhagen. Yup Carles lives in Denmark y’all
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//////////Reply by dakota
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 9:08 pm
@Crystal Carles,
cool ur from denmark 2!
men jeg må nu indrømme at du er dårlig til at trolle..
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//////////Reply by Crystal Carles
//////////Posted May 20th, 2010 at 4:08 am
@dakota, Jeg sucker for vildt til at trolle. Hva’ det så end er? Enlighten me…
May 19th, 2010 at 4:05 pm
I wish I had skinny alt legs like him. All I’s gots is these muscular cyclist legs.
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//////////Reply by supasoakurgh
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 11:03 pm
@AlistairTheSun, cyclist legs rule.
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May 19th, 2010 at 4:10 pm
Looks like some serious viral marketing for Crystal Castles
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May 19th, 2010 at 5:03 pm
well that wasnt fun to watch at all..
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May 19th, 2010 at 5:27 pm
http://forums.hipinion.com/
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//////////Reply by bitch nigga
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 5:33 pm
@James, NIGGA IS U STUPID
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May 19th, 2010 at 5:42 pm
I am bringing him back to hipinion.
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May 19th, 2010 at 5:51 pm
h8 jerkstore
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May 19th, 2010 at 7:04 pm
this is carles
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May 19th, 2010 at 7:35 pm
He is probably the biggest cunt in the world. Can someone please just fucking rip his stupid fucking head off and show it to his mum. She will cry tears of happiness
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May 19th, 2010 at 7:41 pm
“Dance like no one is watching”.
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May 19th, 2010 at 7:56 pm
i just dont understand… why would someone film themselves doing this? why would they go through the trouble of posting to the internet… AHHH.
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//////////Reply by a lolin bro
//////////Posted May 19th, 2010 at 11:50 pm
@bytch, u dum [via u dum, soz, i didn't mean it, <3 u]
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May 19th, 2010 at 11:29 pm
He had to be from Fremont. lol.
there is nothing to do in Fremont. makes sense.
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May 20th, 2010 at 4:58 am
I’m pretty sure Crystal Castles hates fans like these. I saw them last year at Hard and they seemed kinda pissed to be there.
Hope their ‘real’ fan base is cooler.
<3 Crystal Castles
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May 20th, 2010 at 8:02 am
is this crls, he’s got a genre shirt? If not then i fear that HRO will no longer remain internet and soon cross over meaning we’ll all have to jump ship with our dignity intact.
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May 20th, 2010 at 3:45 pm
i was afraid he was gonna knock down that antique chinese vase with his lanky limbs
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May 27th, 2010 at 7:10 pm
everyone knows you instantly start blowing the fuck up the second you swallow your half a bean… (sarcasm)
pretty sure this bro just ate half a flintstones multi-vitamin.
if this guy really wanted to be alternative he would have taken mdmc (look it up) not mdma. mdma is so mainstream.
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June 24th, 2010 at 12:00 am
he only took half a pill. & he was ‘rollin’ secondz after. ? yea, deff deff an ‘etard’? nahhh brah. poser<33 but its kute-c so its alrighty-oo
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